dated thoughts, left here
left here.
thoughts about life.
not daily. maybe not even monthly.
just the things that felt worth writing down.
not daily. maybe not even monthly.
just the things that felt worth writing down.
some of these are years old.
i don’t always agree with the person who wrote them.
that’s kind of the point.
i don’t always agree with the person who wrote them.
that’s kind of the point.
the archive
dec 9 · 1546 · 2022
sometimes i like the way my hair curls,
the tangled mess of dark brown yarn;
sometimes i like the sound of my own voice,
the crumbling noise of gravel being made;
sometimes i like my smile,
the creases of fresh pressed linens;
sometimes i like the scars on my back,
a constellation waiting for a person to glance up;
sometimes i like
dec 3 · 1043 · 2023
i hate myself. how could you ever love me?
i’m sitting in bed as i write this,
and my eyes are blurred with tears.
i can barely form a word.
my phone is on do not disturb
but i check it every minute just to see
if you replied.
i know it’s not fair to you,
not fair for me to ask for reassurance
when your life is falling apart at the seams.
am i jumping to conclusions again?
was it bad for me to picture us together forever
and ever? picture what our house would look like?
i checked to see if you replied again.
you didn’t.
i am going to sit here and overthink every comment
you made, every glance, until i’ve convinced myself
that you hate me and that i am deserving of nothing,
at which point i will choose to flee,
deeming this as a way of saving myself,
leaving you confused with feelings of betrayal.
and me, thinking i just saved myself.
dec 21 · 0023 · 2023
do you know that you are in everything i do?
your face replaces the one on the milk carton, missing but not forgotten.
your face replaces the one on the milk carton, missing but not forgotten.
june 25 · 1121 · 2025
there is something so peaceful about,
yet utterly exhausting, about the passing of time.
it’s not exhausting until you look back on it though, is it?
the peace comes from the before, when you look back and realize you’ve grown; the exhaust comes from the after, when you realize what it took from you.
it’s not exhausting until you look back on it though, is it?
the peace comes from the before, when you look back and realize you’ve grown; the exhaust comes from the after, when you realize what it took from you.
somewhere along the way,
this stopped being only mine.
↓
↓
aug 25 · 1954 · 2026
i made this page today.
i’m not sure what i’m expecting to do with it.
spread joy?
introduce others into cultures different from their own?
these cultures are never truly that different.
sure, we may dress different,
sit down for meals at different times.
our opinions on governance
and what to teach our children may differ.
but does the crux of our humanity?
what is the crux of your humanity?
i’ve been trying to define my humanity lately.
to define at what point i would sit back
and make the realization that beneath all
of the things that i’ve been taught,
places i’ve been,
people i’ve loved,
the things i’ve been afraid of—
there is something underneath it all.
something that is mine.
i don’t know what it is yet.
maybe that’s what i’m trying to find here.
aug 25 · 2242 · 2026
run back to the roses where we [were]
under the moon for the first time.
aug 26 · 0003 · 2026
the disrespect at the end was louder
than every good memory we ever had,
and that’s when i knew i was done.
aug 26 · 0051 · 2026
i genuinely feel undatable.
is it because of my actions? how do you truly know the difference between someone ready for commitment and someone not?
i’ve always heard that you know when you know, but is that true?
i’ve been on at least a hundred dates in the past few years and no one really has pure intentions.
do you look for the one with the least amount of fucked up shit or keep searching for the one with the purest intentions?
is it because of my actions? how do you truly know the difference between someone ready for commitment and someone not?
i’ve always heard that you know when you know, but is that true?
i’ve been on at least a hundred dates in the past few years and no one really has pure intentions.
do you look for the one with the least amount of fucked up shit or keep searching for the one with the purest intentions?
aug 26 · 0058 · 2026
i wonder if you still think about
the life we could have had like i do.
leave something behind
you can leave yours here, too.
a thought.
a memory.
something you can’t stop thinking about.
you don’t need a name.
if you send it in, it may become part of this archive.
leave a thought →
a memory.
something you can’t stop thinking about.
you don’t need a name.
if you send it in, it may become part of this archive.
some things are worth keeping.
some things are worth leaving.
sometimes they’re the same thing.
some things are worth leaving.
sometimes they’re the same thing.
nothing is actually casual.